Press Start

Anyone else remember wondering why the pause button was called Start? I mean, you used the pause button all the time. And what the hell was Select anyway? Well, it is a long celebrated tradition to press the Start button to go into the main menu of a game. Creepy enough, I cannot find any information on it. I will keep looking, but I got nothing. However, the Start button just happens to be the button to start the game. Live with it. Logic assumes: in the interest that the Start button actually be worth making in the first place was to let it be the pause button too. Now, Ninteno seems to be trying to break that by making the 1+2 or Plus+Minus button combo count as the start button for many games. Select is a strange one though. In the early NES, the only way to navigate the main menu was to press the Select button.

Today, I want to talk about Scott Pilgrim: The Game. It is a download title that happens to be a throwback game in 16-bit. Hell, it is even an old genre from the SNES days: the beat-em-up. Complete with the obnoxious elevator gauntlet (that I mentioned earlier), endless enemies that just will not die, and the highly repetitive but irritating bosses. It basically plays like the old Turtles in Time. They even spiced it up with a slight RPG system. You can buy stat upgrades, but they are expensive and time consuming to grind for. So, of course I grinded for them. The killer funny part is the 8-bit chiptune music. I do not mind hipsters getting into retrogaming if it means more games like Scott Pilgrim. I said it when Mega Man 9 was announced: this is going to mean more old-school games. Even if Sonic the Hedgehog 4 failed ro live up to the boasts of Sonic Team, I am OK with the attempt. I played what they released so far and I would not mind seeing more of it. Playing games that have existed for 15-20 years is great, but I need a new spice to my old-school games. Honestly, if you have  not seen Scott Pilgrim: The Game or Mega Man 9 and you remember old-school gaming, get into the retro thing for a little bit. You will thank me to dust off those old consoles.

GAMING MUSIC:

I do not know if you guys knew this, but I listen to the Song of the post while writing it. It sets the mood for what I want to say. This choice I am presenting to y'all is the Brawl version of King Dedede's theme. I have this one play every time I play the Halberd stage, because dammit, it gets the group focused. King Dedede is my favorite Kirby character, because he is edgy, he the is villain, he is the nemesis, and he is the anti-hero. Rolled into a platformer obviously suited for new gamers and younger gamers, I can still celebrate Kirby games. I am so happy that Nintendo obviously celebrated Kirby games as well. The franchise gets to sit among the king, the hardcore, and the obscure, and beat the hell out of them. Kirby gets to be redeemed as a status in gaming thanks to Super Smash Bros. and I would like it if you also recognized that.

Like a Boss

Still no luck with job and car front. Life sure is tough. BAWWW! I have been busy and who knows how spotty my posts are going to be, but I wanted to do some writing tonight.

If you have not already played Dante's Inferno, then you need to. Many people say Dante's Inferno is just a God of War clone. This is very true, I will not even try to deny it. However, what Kratos lacks, Dante makes up for in personality. The whole God of War series felt like one huge roid rage. Kratos is pissed, we get it. At least Dante's character is set up to save his also deceased wife. He never even cared about his fate, as long as she did not fall prey to Satan. I have not beaten it, but I am far enough in to understand why she went to hell, and more importantly: why he is there. No spoilers in that regard, but it does feel a little more fulfilling than, "THE GODS SCREWED ME!!! AARGH!!! HULK SMASH!!!" Now, do I think Dante's Inferno is better than God of War? No. To be honest, neither is better. In one you sleep with bitches, fight hand-to-hand with Ares, and doesn't afraid of anything. In the other, you literally kick down the door to Hell screaming, "where the fuck are you, Satan?" I understand Darksiders follows a similar suit and has also been accused of being a God of War clone.

This pisses me off on Kratos proportions.

What we, as gamers, are witnessing for the first time in a while is the spontaneous generation of a new genre. Not only that, but a good one. I do not exactly recall Sonic the Hedgehog being called a Mario clone, despite overwhelming similarities to the level of being major symbols in the Nintendo and Sega console wars. Stop calling these new games clones of God of War and friggin' play them. You will immediately notice that Dante's Inferno definitely has quality. I am not very far in, but so far I have stolen the Grim Reaper's scythe and tore him in half through his face as he begged for mercy. Then, I used that same scythe to stab the brain of a giant minotaur-thing and open the gates of hell. Inside, I managed to rip King Minos' face in half before running into Cleopatra. Cleopatra, being giant, blue, and has tongues for nipples. These nipples also lactating demonic babies with scythes for hands. Once I beat her, she then puked out a zombified Marc Anthony.

Why aren't you playing this game yet? It happens to be cheap. They did a great a little homage to old beat-em-ups with an elevator gauntlet. That was definitely a lot of fun.

GAMING MUSIC

Sonic Advenure 2 is perhaps the last great Sonic game. However, many would beg to differ. New-school Sonic receives a lot of flak for basically desecrating what Sonic was and meant to his fans. The truth of the matter is that these things change. If you did not expect a company's cash cow to be milked to death over and over again, you don't know jack about video gaming. It is inevitable that anything that is popular within our hobby will be ruined eventually. The beauty of it is that you can  keep playing your old favorites and get over it. For me, this song running on the true final boss sealed the game in my library of favorites. The Finalhazard is a particularly chilling boss, considering that he is not even trying to kill you. Not only that, but his immune system is what is protecting him from you. What the fuck? It also marks the only time that Sonic needed another Super hedgehog to help him to beat something. Furthermore, that second hedgehog even dies at the end of the fight (retconned later by Shadow the Hedgehog, but we will just ignore that, SA2 is just more satisfying if Shadow dies). Even in Sonic Rush, Sol Blaze was present because there were two villains. Epic fight was epic.

Tornadoes in China?

Earth used Earthquake. It's not very effective. Earth used Surf. It's super effective!

Too soon? Regardless of whether I have offended you or not. It has been written.

So, there is massive damage in Japan and how does that affect us? Well, it is hard to say for certain. With the threat of the largest scale meltdown in history after following one of the most devastating natural disasters we have ever seen. They are not having a good weekend, but Rebecca Black has the right idea.

Now here is the important part I want my readers to realize. Chances are that you play video games. Who is the highest provider of video games in history and now? Japan. Now, I am not the tacky kind of person who wants to tell everyone how to feel. However, I cannot help but feel strong emotions, myself. The highlight of said emotion was when CNN showed a Japanese news channel with the text: "HELP." Man, it really sucks to be Japanese right now. Note how there is no massive looting and the Japanese people are not whining about the effects this will have on their economy. We should definitely be concerned about the effect this has on future releases of video games. I mean, Sony and Nintendo are both based in Japan. Do I really have to explain that?

This event gave me the strange urge to play SimCity for the first time in 10 years. So, I built a thriving island city and forced various natural disasters. It was interesting spending the money and time to rebuild everything. It certainly helped pass the time as I followed the news on Japan. I almost consider it a personal homage to said events. It is the best I can do from here. However, consider this weird, I am not usually the philanthropic type.

GAMING MUSIC

Not particularly special beyond being one of my favorite tracks. This is the song from Ice Cap Act 1 from Sonic the Hedgehog 3. I remember humming this tune in second grade. It is a shame that one of the last great Sonic games was Sonic 3 & Knuckles. However, Sonic Adventure 2 and Sonic Rush have been good titles too. Anyone play that weird RPG by BioWare?

Edit: My brother just claimed to a friend that Dante (Devil May Cry) while playing Marvel vs Capcom 3 was from Dante's Inferno. Wow, fail much?